mundane

Sunday 23rd January 2000

08:56
wakes opens eyes turns to look at clock sleeps wakes turns over sleeps		Glad that it is Sunday and that there is a day of free choices ahead of me. I'm dozing in and out of reality not really wanting to get up and not really wanting to sleep. Know that I will have to getup to go to the toilet.

08:58
wakes turns onto back runs hands through hair three times rubs left eye		Feels like my hair is all sticking right up, makes my scalp feel horrible at the root of that weight.

09:00
gets out of bed		I need to find pen and paper if I am going to do this project today, before I forget all of the things I have done so far. I Think there’s some paper in the spare room.

09:01
walks to spare room opens wardrobe takes paper walks to table picks up pen		Wardrobe door is ropey, I can't get it to open properly, oh never mind, I'll fix it later when I am not worrying about this. The computer speakers are still turned on, I can see the red light under the table. I'm irritated at having to document all of this trivia, probably worried that it's not going to work and that I am not going to be able to use the information I spend all day building up. I am not really sure how much detail I need and which bits are more important, after all it's impossible to document it all.

09:02
walks back to bedroom sits down and writes		Need to check the time, I don't have my watch on.

09:04
		Finished writing all that stuff. I really need to go to the loo now, so I'm going. I wonder where I've left my watch.

09:05
walks to bathroom pushes door to sits down on toilet urinates takes toilet paper wipes stands up flushes turns round		Seat's not as cold as I expected and I can feel the warmth from the radiator next to me. I'm checking my face in the mirror there's nothing unusual there but I wish my hair didn't get so messy.

walks downstairs to lounge greets B sits		Going downstairs to see what B is up to, he's sitting in the lounge. Greeting B, Hiya. I 'll sit down for a moment next to him. Where's my watch. B is taking a sip of his tea, I wonder how long he has been up for. Now I see that he's reading the puzzle book that we got for Christmas, I've got a copy of a mind puzzle that I was given at work, it's in my laptop bag somewhere. Do we have a clipboard somewhere, B thinks we do, one that I had from the last job but I don't remember seeing that for some time. I don't think I'll ever find it. I guess I'm stuck with this hardback A4 notebook to carry around for today.

walks to hall takes sheet of paper out of bag walks to lounge hands paper to B walks to hall crouches down unzips pocket of rucksack takes watch out		The puzzle is in here somewhere, one of these bits of paper, this one. Got it. Here you go B, it's a lateral thinking puzzle but you should hear the more creative answers that I heard from C and D. Where's my watch, I forgot about it, probably still in my rucksack pocket from swimming last night.This side I think, yes, it's here.

walks to kitchen puts watch on switches kettle on picks up fishfood takes lid off pot pours flakes into fishtank		I'm going to make a cup of tea. There's enough water in there, on. The fish look enthusiastic, I'll feed them. Shaking the pot in front of them in the hope that they learn to associate that with being fed. They seem to be reasonably hungry but I can't really tell, I'm kidding myself. This isn't one of my favourite mugs, they must both be in the dishwasher.

opens cupboard takes mug closes cupboard opens cupboard takes tin opens tin takes tea bag puts tea bag in mug closes tin puts tin in cupboard closes cupboard		I hear the kettle click off

picks up kettle pours water		There's not too much scum on the surface, I'm happy with that.

talks to B opens drawer takes teaspoon closes drawer stirs tea with teaspoon opens fridge takes bottle of milk closes fridge removes teabag with teaspoon drops teabag into bin puts teaspoon in mug		B's behind me, tells me his resolution to the problem. Just want to make sure that he got to the answer the same way I did, yes, sounds like it. Now I'm impressed, I'm pretty sure that was about twice as fast as it took me. So I'm telling him about C's creative answer and he's amused, I then tell him about D's answer and we laugh about its strange ingenuity. I need a teaspoon to get this teabag out, this one will do, there aren't very many left, must put the dishwasher on. I'm idly pushing the teabag against the mug to get all of the flavour out. I'm putting the milk on the side, B notices the floating fishfood and tells me that he's just fed them. I thought the arrangement was that I feed them so that we don't have this problem every morning. Still, I'm not really bothered, it won't hurt them. B goes on to tell me that he's emptied the bucket of water prepared for the tank in and he's made up another bucket-full. I have to admit, the water is considerably less yellow.

09:15
removes teabag with teaspoon drops teabag into bin pours milk into mug returns bottle to fridge rinses teaspoon puts teaspoon on draining board		I think that's plenty brewed now, the teabag can go in the bin. The bin seems to be a carrier bag hanging from a drawer again, don't know why we bother with big plastic bins if we never remember to buy bin liners. I'll rinse this teaspoon since there aren't many in the drawer.

opens cupboard takes bowl closes cupboard takes packet from shelf opens packet pours into bowl takes pill out of packet swallows pill with sip of tea writes		I'll have a packet of cereal, if I have chocolate, I'll still want the cereal afterwards anyway. I open this new packet of cereal then. Oh, its already open, perhaps B had some for breakfast, no probably I opened it yesterday. Now that I've remembered, I'll take my pill. Have to stop for a minute to write all of this down, it's daft, writing all these silly little details down, I can't believe I'm documenting such trivia.

closes packet takes packet to fridge opens fridge closes fridge returns packet to shelf		The cereal packet can go back I push the plastic back inside and close the box. I've opened the fridge and I'm standing there with the cereal packet in my hand. This isn't right. I'm not all there this morning. Back to the shelf, the fish dart away as I reach over them to put the cereal back - will they ever learn?

opens fridge takes two bottles closes fridge pours milk into bowl puts empty bottle on side puts foil lid in bin opens second bottle pours milk into bowl replaces foil lid returns bottle to fridge		I haven't put any milk in my bowl yet, that's what I went to the fridge for. This bottle is almost empty, I'm going to need another one. That's that one empty, I'll leave it next to the sink for rinsing later. Holding the foil with one finger, shaking the bottle from side to side a bit before I open it. Just enough to cover my cereal.

opens drawer takes spoon closes drawer puts spoon in bowl picks up bowl and mug walks to lounge		I'll put the spoon in the bowl so that its easier to carry, OK I'm done in here.

puts notebook, and tea on chair sits down takes notebook wipes notebook with hand wipes chair with hand makes notes replaces handbook takes mug sips tea puts mug down		I'll sit here so that I can put this notebook and my mug of tea on the chair next to me. There's noise in here but the TV is off, oh, it's the radio. I need to make a couple of notes before I dig into my cereal. What's that on the chair? There's brown powdery stuff everywhere, must be on the back of the notebook, yes it is. I wipe it off and then brush it off the chair. I guess it must be grated chocolate from the kitchen surface, from last night. I'm going to switch the radio off. That's better. Now where's the remote control, oh yes, on the hamster cage where I left it last night. I concetrate on eating my cereal now, with a Batman cartoon to distract me. The artwork has really changed for Batman, it has a whole different image to the old ones, much more sophisticated and ambiguous. I can't really hear the dialogue. Looks like it's on digital from the picture quality, I'll have to switch to analogue to see if there are any subtitles. There are. I'm surprised and glad. What's B doing? Probably getting dressed.

09:30
hands remote control to B picks up mug		Here he is, dressed. I've dumped my stuff on the only spare chair in the room, so I'd best move it in case he wants to sit down. Here, take this & I'll get the tea - take it, right, there you go.

09:35
puts bowl on floor drinks tea sniffs		There's no where else to put it so it can go on the floor here for the moment. I can wrap my hands around my tea now and hope it counteracts the chilly sensations I now have from all that cold milk. I know that I'm distracted by the TV but none of it is really going in at the moment, I just let the images flicker in my eye. I've run out of tea now, I'm staring at the dregs wondering if I want some more.

09:38
writes		This is the end of the second side of my first sheet of A4 paper, in half an hour. That's one side for every 15 minutes. So by the end of a 12 hour stint, I'm likely to have 24 double-sided A4 sheets of paper. Well if it's true, my hand is going to really hurt. Feels like I might have to go for a shit in a minute. I talk to B about having to document my bodily functions. He reckons I can leave them out, hmm, not convinced myself. I can't see the TV now, because the sun has started to shine on it really intensely. I don't really want to watch it anyway but I don't know what else to do with myself. I'll think through how I am going to write this up. I think I should probably do it as a scientific paper - so that it comes across as a serious and objective study. I discuss this with B and he tells me about the third person impassive, or something, anyway it's not much use at the moment because he can't think of an example. Anyway I think I know what he means. That itch isn't going to go away, I'll have to scratch it.

talks to B watches TV writes talks to B		Prompted by the Persil ad on the TV, B mentions that he has managed to get the yellow stain out of my dressing-gown. He explains that he used a new tablet in the washing cycle. What is the plan for today then? B says fix the power sockets in the study even though this involves taking the floorboards up. We could get a carpet fitted afterwards and get one done in the bedroom at the same time. That reminds B, we should go and buy the flooring for the hall whilst the sale is still on.

B leaves room		B also mentions that he wants to vacuum upstairs. He goes out.

picks up mug picks up bowl walks to kitchen		I can hear the sound of the vacuum cleaner upstairs now. Didn't take him long to get round to doing that. Bit enthusiastic if you ask me.

opens dishwasher moves bowls puts mugs in dishwasher		Well, best get on with something.

opens cupboard takes dishwasher tablet closes cupboard opens wrapper breaks tablet places tablet in dishwasher drawer closes dishwasher switches on pushes cycle button pushes start button		I suppose I should put this thing on, that would be unusually helpful of me. There’s a bizarre red thing in the middle of this tablet, like someone dropped their vitamin pill into it before it set. I guess it has some new special purpose but I really can’t be bothered to find out. Break it in half and then it should fit, no it doesn’t. Again, then - now I have four quarters and that red pill bit that has fallen out. Fits now. I’m putting this on "Normal" because I’m not convinced that "Economy" will do the job.

09:55
walks into hall picks up jacket picks up rucksack opens front door walks into porch hangs jacket on hook puts rucksack down walks back into hall closes front door		I can’t really put it off any more, I’m going to have a shower now. I’ll just get this stuff out of the way so that the hall isn’t so cluttered.It’s cold in here, as usual. But my feet are freezing, I’m still walking around barefoot.

walks upstairs to spare room opens airing cupboard takes towel walks to landing		I need to find my towel. I left it downstairs during the week, hanging on a radiator. B probably thought he just washed it and put it away, so I’ll have a look in the airing cupboard.

takes towel from banister walks to bathroom opens washing basket puts towel in closes basket		This one can go in the wash now.

10:00
closes bathroom door undresses puts pyjamas on laundry basket puts watch on laundry basket		I wish we had a cosy, warm carpeted, finished bathroom. It’s not too cold in here though. That bath looks horrible.

looks around picks up detergent sprays around bath picks up sponge		Right, I’m going to clean it before I shower. Where’s that detergent, it’s down here by the bath. Just need a sponge now, this one will do.

scrubs bath, walls and shower fittings turns cold tap on		I can’t reach very far up the wall from here, this will have to do, I’m not exactly spring-cleaning.

rinses with shower turns on warm tap		Just rinse all of that off, mind the edges otherwise it’ll leak through to the downstairs ceiling.

steps into bath pulls curtain		My feet are so cold against that warm water, hopefully the rest of me is a bit warmer. I’ll just go for it.

rinses hair		I’ll do the works this morning, I seem to have the energy - from cleaning the bath I guess.

shakes bottles queezes lotion onto hand replaces bottle massages into hair		I always have to shake this bottle to get anything out even though I leave it upside-down, it’s really annoying.

rinses hair takes tube squeezes lotion onto hand massages onto face replaces tube takes bottle		I remember that disabled lady that served me in a department store over Christmas. She was wheel-chair bound and this particular checkout was upstairs.

takes sponge squeezes lotion onto sponge rubs sponge against back rubs sponge against chest rubs sponge against arms puts sponge down		She was really slow with her hands - they were smaller than usual, stumpy little fingers and there were suppressed pained expressions on some of the faces of the Christmas shoppers waiting in the checkout queue. They tried so hard to wait patiently and had these ridiculously strained expressions on their faces which only made it worse because they were quite obviously in a rush.

takes bottle squeezes lotion onto hand massages into hair rinses hair and face takes tube squeezes lotion onto hand massages onto face takes bottle squeezes lotion onto hand massages into hair rinses hair and face		I wonder if she was really bored in the job but that her alternatives were even more tedious. I am glad that I was able to exchange a few amicable words with her whilst she did my transaction.

takes soap rubs soap on body rubs soap in hands replaces soap rubs hands on body		The soap I am using smells strange, I always notice that smell when I use this soap, I wonder if it is one of the unexpected ingredients. Could it be coal tar like they have in anti-dandruff shampoos, perhaps that’s a stupid ingredient to have in soap, I don’t know. I could check the packet for the ingredients list.

10:25
turns taps off shakes shower curtain reaches for towel wraps towel around head reaches for towel wraps towel around body sits down on washing basket

writes picks up bottle throws bottle in bin takes bottle from side of bath throws bottle in bin		I could get my dressing-gown instead of this bath sheet. Oh, I forgot, B has just washed it. I wonder how long this bottle has been down there. There’s an empty shower-gel bottle here as well, but where’s the lid. Of course, it’ll be on the shower fitting where the bottle was hanging from.

takes lid from shower fitting throws lid in bin		There’s lots of noise going on, I think it was there before but I’ve only just realised. Shuffling around, pipes clanging. Sounds like there’s a howling gale blowing through the extractor fan. It’s not though, must be B doing something.

stands up picks up pyjamas and watch

walks to landing takes towel off head puts towel on banister		B is in the study opposite, looks like he’s doing some wiring under the floor – he’s got the carpet up in one corner.

talks with B		We are discussing the layout of the lighting circuit and how it links through to downstairs. B apologises for not having threaded the tie through my dressing-gown yet. I make it quite obvious that I am not bothered and tell him that I hadn’t expected it to be able to use it. B tells me that he’s about to do some drilling and it’s a bit dusty so I might want to get out. I suggest closing the door but he is adamant that it won’t make too much of a mess and tells me that he’s just done some drilling.

walks to bedroom sits on bed writes		I close the bedroom door behind me anyway. The pyjamas and watch get dumped on the bed, I need to sit down again and catch up.

walks to chest of drawers opens pot puts finger into pot rubs lotion onto face puts finger into pot rubs lotion onto face		B comes in and starts to take his fleece off. What’s up? Oh you got too hot.He’s putting a T-shirt on instead now.I need to put some moisturiser on my face, it feels really dry. I am watching the colour and texture of my skin change as I rub the moisturiser into my face.

takes comb combs hair shakes head		I’ll shake it loose again so that it doesn’t dry straight and flat – at least this way it can curl however it wants.

opens drawer takes knickers puts knickers on walks to corner		Right, knickers, hopefully there’s some in here. Yes but there aren’t any socks. What am I going to wear? Oh joggers and T-shirt will do, they’re there still from yesterday evening.

picks up joggers puts joggers on picks up bra and T-shirt puts bra and T-shirt on bed picks up braputs bra on walks to chest of drawers picks up deodorant takes lid offrubs under each arm replaces lidreplaces deodorant walks to corner picks up T-shirt

puts T-shirt on walks to spare room takes socks out of washing basket walks to bedroom		I know there aren’t any socks in the drawer, I think I saw them earlier in the lounge or spare room. Spare room I think, I’m pretty sure. Yes, here’s the washing basket, these will do.

sits on bed separates pair of socks puts one sock on puts the other sock on reaches under bed for trainers puts trainers on		I could clean the car today, I’ve been meaning to do it for ages and I think I could do it this morning without really hating it. Sun’s out anyway.Now, where did I put my watch whilst I was showering - I left it on the laundry basket.

walks to bathroom turns and walks to bedroom picks up watch from bed puts watch on		It’s not there, I must have brought it into the bedroom then.Oh yes, with my pyjamas.

walks to landing talks with B		I’m asking B whether the bucket of water in the kitchen can go into the fish tank yet because I need the bucket for washing the car. B says that he prepared it 2 hours ago, he’s already put last night’s bucket in apparently, anyway it might still be a bit cold. I don’t think the temperature difference after two hours would cause them a problem and B agrees. B wants to know why I’m asking so I explain that I want to wash the cars. He wants me to was his too. I’m worried that I don’t have the energy for both and might not even do one if I know I’m expected to clean both of them so I screw my face up and groan at him.

walks downstairs to kitchen picks up plastic bowl fills with water from bucket pours water from bowl into fish tank repeats seven times picks bucket up empties into fish tank picks up bucket		The fish don’t seem to be shying away from the fresh water. This one’s a bit enthusiastic, it’s swimming right into the water as I pour it in. I’m holding the container higher so that it makes more bubbles, it might scare the fish away. No! It’s even more enthusiastic about swimming into the stream now.

10:50
walks to utility room puts bucket into sink turns taps on waits for bucket to fill turns taps off		I’ll make the soapy water for car-washing a little bit warm so that my hands don’t hurt so much from the cold.

moves bottles on shelf		I can’t see the car shampoo, it should be down this end with all of the other car stuff. Maybe we ran out - is this why I haven’t washed the car, because we have run out of shampoo? I’ll check behind all of these bottles.

takes bottle down unscrews cap pours liquid into cap empties cap into bucket repeats four times takes sponge from shelf puts sponge in bucket picks up bucket walks to front door opens front door puts bucket down in porch		Here it is, that’s a relief . . . . I think.

takes watch off puts watch in pocket goes into hall picks up keys unlocks porch door picks up bucket puts bucket down on doorstep picks up rubbish bag puts rubbish bag on doorstep
walks to kitchen walks to conservatory unlocks and opens door walks through garden unlocks and opens garden gate
walks to outside tap attaches hose to tap pulls nozzle of hose walks to front of house walks to outside tap turns tap on

walks to hoze nozzle puts foot on hoze moves foot closer to nozzle picks up hoze by the nozzle turns nozzle puts hoze down walks into hall picks up keys moves car walks to porch leaves keys on floor		Rats, I should have turned the nozzle off before I turned the water on, it’s going to me moving by the time I get there. I’ll stick my foot here, then work towards the nozzle – hopefully that will stop it from pointing at me.

washes car: starts at back sponges section hoses down repeats		I notice that I can reach the middle of the roof of this car - that’s a novelty to me, all the other cars I have washed have been too high up. Normally, I have to open the door and stand on the step to reach.Next door, C is cleaning the inside of his lounge window, I can see the bottle of spray window cleaning fluid on the windowsill. I keep glancing at him in case I am able to catch his eye & wave but he doesn’t seem to notice me.

		Next time I look up, he’s left the room, the bottle and cloth left on the windowsill. Why has he left in the middle of cleaning the window – it’s not like him to not tidy up after himself. Maybe he is still very emotional. Maybe he was crying too much last night to want to show his face. He’s been so sad since his wife died, I really feel for him.

		I’m just at the end of washing my car, and as I look up, I notice the opposite neighbour getting into the passenger seat of a small black car, probably her son’s. It drives away before I am able to catch her eye. As I’m cleaning the bonnet, I notice my reflection in the windscreen and realise that my hair has gone haywire – it’s dried sticking out all over the place and has gone manically curly.

		C drives past, smiling at me - I wave at him & he waves back. I guess he’s not all that upset then. I’m happier now.

walks to porch picks up keys gets in car tucks hair behind ear parks car round the corner walks into hall puts keys down picks up another set of keys walks to B’s car moves car		I’ll have to put my car round the corner so that I can move B’s into a sensible position. I’m not going to park it so that all 4 wheels are on the pavement like one of our neighbours does.

washes car: starts at back sponges section hoses down repeats		A teenage boy comes out of the house further up the road, he’s bending down by the front tyre, I’ve no idea whether it’s his car or what he is doing so I keep watching him whilst I carry on with the car washing. He’s walking round the front now, it looks like he might own it from the way he’s apparently fussing over it without actually doing much.Now he’s returning from somewhere, I didn’t see him go. He’s got the bonnet open and seems to be a bit self-conscious, I think he’s noticed me watching him.I’ll just do the hub caps and then I’m finished, except I forgot to clean the ones on mine.The boy over the road seems to be working on his car now.

parks B’s car back where it was moves other car		Just my hubcaps left, I’m not too worried about them, as long as I get most of the dirt off.
picks up bucket walks to front door puts down on doorstep walks to outside tap reels hose back in

pulls connector off tap jumps to one side		forgot to turn the tap off before I disconnected it, that was close, I was almost soaked.

switches tap almost off rinses hands switches tap off		Hold a sec, I’m just going to rinse the shampoo off my hands.

11:50
walks into lounge sits down writes		I’ve got to write as much of that down as I can remember. My nails are horribly dirty.They’re annoying me now.
walks to kitchen turns taps on at sink scrubs hands with soap and brush rinses hands opens drawer takes clean towel drys hands on towel pushes down on hand cream dispenser rubs lotion into hands

talks with B		B wants to know what we should do for lunch. I’m not really bothered whether we stay or go except that there’s nothing really interesting to eat in the house. We could find out what D&E are doing.

11:55
walks to lounge with B		B phones D&E to ask them what they are doing for lunch in case we can meet & and go to a pub together. There is no answer so he hangs up. We wonder whether to just walk down to the local or try and find somewhere new. I’m not sure about driving around to find a new pub, didn’t work very well last time we did that.

12:00
		B says that he’s going to ring them on D’s mobile and wants to know what the number is so I suggest he looks it up on my mobile.He’s fetched my mobile and is ringing D on the normal phone. They are away for the weekend so the conversation is brief. We decide to wander to the local for a pint just to get out of the house but B wants to finish the wiring first.

walks upstairs, following B walks round the ladder on the landing walks into spare room switches PC on sits down		Don’t really know what to do with myself for the next few minutes. I’m sure if I sit down at the PC, I’ll find something to amuse me. I can hear hammering going on in the background. Just going to write this stuff down, oh but where’s my watch, in the lounge I think.

walks downstairs to kitchen walks into lounge picks up watch walks upstairs to spare room		What am I doing? Oh yes, watch, lounge.
sits down at PC types puts watch on wrist

removes watch puts watch on other wrist		No, what am I doing, that’s the wrong wrist . . isn’t it . . yes, it goes on this one.

writes		I’ll number some more pages whilst I am waiting for the login to complete.

types and uses mouse		I’ll check to see if I have any mail, that’ll give me something to do if I have. I get two reminders’ for people’s birthday’s that I’ve missed and feel guilty. Why am I so disorganised at home, must try harder. A loud bang in the loft makes me stop and wait, wondering if B is hurt. There are more noises, not so loud.

types and uses mouse		I’ve got two messages, the first one is from X about this project and the second is junkmail. I read the first message with interest and delete the junkmail.I’m filing the message from X under the gallery name. The message was encouraging and I have a little more resolve to finish this project. I agree with the points X makes in her mail, they seem very astute. I’m not sure whether the notes I am making are honest enough, or objective or even subjective enough. I feel encouraged by X’s mail and determined to carry on. But I just want to play a game for while, to rest, so I’m closing my mail program down and hanging the dial-up connection.Finding the icon for this game is always a pain so I’m dragging a shortcut to the desktop.

12:15
		At least whilst I’m playing this there’s not so much to document – I’m not really moving around much and my thoughts are almost entirely focused on the game, with it’s irritating background music filling any gaps where thoughts might conspire to happen.B’s standing behind me now, I glance at him to confirm that he’s watching the game and not waiting to ask me something. We exchange some banal comments about the progress of the game and he then asks if I’m ready to go to the pub. I grunt a concession and he leaves.

13:00
walks to bathroom pushes door to sits down on toilet urinates takes toilet paper wipes stands up flushes		Bored of this game now, I’m closing it down and shutting the PC off.

walks downstairs to hall rummages in handbag walks into porch crouches down takes purse and rings puts rings on picks up purse stands up walks into hall		I need to find my purse before we go to the pub.

talks with B picks up keys walks out of house		B asks me if I have any money, I’m standing here checking in my purse. Here’s fifteen quid and there’s some change so there’s plenty even if we decide to eat. I watch B lock the door and wait for him to come down the steps.A small black car drives up and our neighbour waves at B as she gets out. B waves back. I’m three steps behind everything at the moment, trying to catch up with time. I manage to grin in her direction before she disappears.

walks along pavement puts arm around B’s arm walks along pavement takes arm away crosses road puts arm around B’s arm walks along pavement		The cold wind out here has woken my appetite and I think about having lunch in the pub. I’m putting my arm round his to keep my hand warm.

walks down path crosses road		Nearly forgot about the shortcut - I was going to walk straight along the pavement. Just as well one of us is awake.The sign outside still has "Yes, we are still here" chalked up and I wonder whether the move fell through at the last minute.

walks into pub hands purse to B		The people on the table behind us as we walk through to the bar suddenly burst into raucous laughter and I glance round at them. I’m handing my purse to B with a grin and I ask him for a pint. I hate having to speak to people in loud places - I always have to repeat myself.

picks up pint		B speaks to the landlady and orders our pints. We take our pints and go in search of a table.

walks to table speaks to lady walks round table speaks to lady		The only spare table in this part of the pub is a tiny round one with two chairs. It’s really close to a table of four but doesn’t look like its taken. I ask the lady sitting nearest whether it’s free but she doesn’t answer even though we made eye contact. I don’t think she heard me. As I’m walking round the table, I catch her eye again and ask the question re-phrased with fewer words and a bit louder. She confirms that there’s only chair taken at their larger table, the one with the jacket on, so I thank her and sit down.

sits down on chair moves table closer shifts chair back moves table closer		B asks me to move the table because there’s not enough room for him to get his legs under.

puts notepaper on table		I’ve put my notes down on the table but I have to tell B not to read them otherwise I might get paranoid about what I am writing down.

talks with B writes talks with B		B suggests that we have a baked spud for lunch and I complain saying that I thought we were going to eat here but it really doesn’t look like he wants to.I point out that having to write this stuff down is one hell of a conversation stopper and I think I should cut down on the amount that I write. I reckon that there’s no point in trying to document our conversations because I simply can’t write that fast.

talks with B writes talks with B		Whilst we are talking I realise that I am holding my chin and sometimes rubbing it like a man who’s thinking about shaving. I promise to keep an eye on myself and try to kill that habit.

talks with B writes talks with B		I just caught myself putting the end of the pen into my mouth. I probably would have chewed it if I wasn’t watching myself so closely knowing that I have to write everything down.

talks with B writes talks with B		The pub is very busy and the noise level is alienating. I notice that my hand is cold from holding the pint glass so I’m trying to sit still without holding onto it. Its annoying me that B doesn’t want to eat here and I have no interest in having a baked spud for lunch.

talks with B writes talks with B		B asks about work and I start to talk about the projects that I am working on. We go on to talk about what is going on at work for me and discuss various projects in some depth, comparing them to B’s work. I find myself fiddling with my necklace and realise that it has got caught on something. I ask B if he can see what is going on with it. B tells me that it has got a thread from my jumper around it. The discussion about work has woken me up a bit and I feel like actually looking around me - I feel less "introverted".

		B asks me if I want another pint, he’s going to get another one.

		I release the clasp, remove the necklace, placing it on the table, then pick it up again by the clasp and put it back on. My face is warming up a little now and I am less inclined to hold onto my pint glass, almost as though I thought it would warm me up, like a cup of tea. I’m suddenly much more aware of the noises and people around me in B’s absence. The smell of food is odd, a bit too meaty and vaguely nauseous. I experience a fleeting affinity with the young girl who is sitting next to me facing her table, with her legs cross-legged up on the chair, reading a book. She appears to be unaffected by her surroundings and relaxed.

		B returns with his pint.

		For some reason, we are now talking about cars. B expresses the desire to sell his and get one with a bigger engine. I accuse him of finding excuses just to get a faster but then add that we should sell his anyway because of the mileage we have put on it. B looks really annoyed with me now. His tone of voice has changed, it sounds like he is really patronising me and I feel myself becoming defensive. I’m going to tell him that he sounds patronising in the hope that he will change his tone. That’s made things worse, he must have been too annoyed already, I’m not going to succeed in changing his mood. B tells me that his reaction is justified. I’ve given up trying to change his mood and tell him bluntly to finish his pint so that we can leave this public arena. He’s refusing to finish it and insists on leaving.

stands up		Now I am really incensed.

walks to pub door		As we get up to leave and navigate the pub tables, I notice that I am a bit disorientated, a bit tipsy I guess. I wonder if the alcohol has affected both our moods. Probably.

walks out of pub		I walk further round the corner waiting for a gap in the traffic, B has already crossed but I didn’t notice until he was already on the other side. I have crossed the road, but I have also walked past the shortcut and B is already walking up it. I could walk back towards him and follow several yards behind but I’m not in the mood for following.

		So rather than backtrack, I continue to walk round the long way, choosing not to have to walk with him to avoid any more irritation. I’m taking notes as I walk which slows me down considerably. I am aware of being a tiny fraction slower to focus my eyes than usual. Its getting a bit cold again so I’ll quicken my step. I’ve just passed the other end of the shortcut and note that B is nowhere to be seen. I’ll check behind be in case he’s decided to follow after me but there’s no sign of him. He’s probably already home.

unlocks porch door walks into porch closes porch door unlocks front door walks into hall closes front door		It’s still locked so he can’t be back yet.

walks to kitchen opens cupboard picks up bag of potatoes closes cupboard		I know that B wants baked spuds and I don’t have any better ideas so I might as well put some in the microwave.

empties bag into sink		These look horribly old, they’ve got roots growing out and dubious looking grey patches. I’m not going to cook these, they’ve really put me off the idea. But B might still want one, I’ll just leave them here and he can make the decision when he gets back. So what am I going to eat?

opens fridge takes out bagels takes out cottage cheese closes fridge		There’s nothing really enticing here, I could just have a bagel with yeast spread and cottage cheese.
puts bagels on kitchen surface puts cottage cheese on kitchen surface picks up bread board puts down on kitchen surface opens drawer takes out bread knife takes bagel puts bagel on bread board cuts bagel in half

puts both halves of bagel into toaster pushes toaster handle down		The toaster is on setting 3 which should be about right, if not a bit low.

opens cupboard takes small plate closes cupboard opens cupboard takes jar and puts on kitchen surface closes cupboard picks up bagels opens fridge puts bagels in fridge closes fridge		B’s still not here, well I’ve not heard him come in anyway. He could have gone down to the video shop or something.

walks to utility room sits on toilet urinates takes toilet paper wipes stands up flushes		I’m going to go downstairs even though it’s cold, I really can’t be bothered to walk up the stairs and back down again, besides my bagel is nearly toasted. Oh, they’ve just finished, well I’ll be quick.

walks to kitchen takes bagel halves out of toaster puts bagel halves on plate opens drawer picks up knife closes drawer opens jar spreads paste onto bagel halves replaces lid of jar opens drawer picks up teaspoon closes drawer opens cottage cheese pot		I wish these bagels were a bit lest toasted. That wretched toaster is unpredictable at the best of times.

fills teaspoon with cottage cheese empties teaspoon onto bagel half repeats
licks teaspoon puts teaspoon in dishwasher replaces lid of cottage cheese picks up cottage cheese opens fridge puts cottage cheese on fridge shelf closes fridge

picks up bagel halves puts bagel halves onto plate picks up plate		Time for another escapist session at the PC I think.

puts plate down		I could do with some liquid to go with these though, orange squash will do.

opens cupboard takes pint glass opens cupboard takes squash bottle opens squash bottle pours liquid into glass replaces lid of squash bottle opens cupboard puts squash bottle in closes cupboard turns cold tap on fills pint glass up turns tap off picks up plate		I glance at the front door as I’m moving around in the kitchen, I don’t know where he’s got to, it’s not like him to be moody. I’m a bit annoyed as though he wanted me to be. Could he already be in the house? But he would have had to lock the door behind him. No, that’s not like him, it’s too petty, he wouldn’t even think of it.

walks upstairs to landing looks into bathroom and study walks into bedroom walks into spare room switches PC on sits down puts plate and glass on table		He’s not in any of these rooms, so he’s not here. I’m glad I didn’t find him here and then have to speak to him knowing that he had locked the door behind him.

14:25
		I connect to the internet and startup my mail program. It’s behaving strangely, taking far too long to check each mailbox, I’m bored, so eventually I kill it. As it is loading a second time, I am sitting eating my bagel, staring at an aeroplane passing through a cloud. I hit send and receive and nothing happens, for several minutes. It’s never been this slow before, I am irritated with it. I am on my last bit of the second bagel now and have eaten all the way round the edge so that I have just a tiny ring left. The mail program eventually comes back with an error message saying that it cannot find the server. I wonder if the server is down and drop the connection.

14:30
		I decide to play a game instead.

14:38
		B is back. Tells me that he has been chatting to the neighbours. Now he’s standing behind me and rubbing my shoulders. He’s telling me the gossip about the neighbours convertible car roof being slashed. I respond accordingly but not enthusiastically. B goes away again.

14:55
walks to the bathroom pushes door to sits down on toilet urinates takes toilet paper wipes		I need the toilet, I’ll put this on pause.

stands up flushes		I could do with a cup of tea to warm me up.

walks into spare room picks up plate walks downstairs to kitchen fills kettle from water jug switches kettle on picks up mug from kitchen surface rinses mug puts mug down opens cupboard picks up tin opens and takes teabag closes tin puts tin in cupboard closes cupboard		As I am making a cup of tea, B parts with a little more gossip. This time it’s about the new sofa that they have just ordered, a cream leather one. The microwave is making a noise in the background but it’s not cooking, it’s only cooling down. B has already cooked his spud and is preparing is food on a plate. He leaves the room.

picks piece of food from plate eats piece of food		I pinch a bit of cold chicken from his plate and am just putting it in my mouth as he returns. I pretend to look guilty

pours water into mug picks up teaspoon stirs removes teabag with teaspoon drops teabag into bin opens fridge takes milk bottle closes fridge removes foil from milk bottle pours into mug replaces foil lid opens fridge puts milk bottle in closes fridge

picks up mug walks to microwave puts mug on notebook opens drawer picks up mug from notebook puts mug on kitchen surface walks to sink tips liquid from papers into sink picks up cloth wipes paper puts cloth down		I balance my cup of tea on the notebook so that I can open the drawer where the chocolates are without having to put anything down. I’ve just spilt it on my notes, must have lost my balance. That didn’t work then. I quickly take the paper to the sink, let the liquid run of and wipe it swiftly with a thin sponge.

walks to microwave takes chocolate bar out of drawer closes drawer picks up mug walks to lounge		I’m going to sit in the lounge and "veg" in front of the TV.

sits down on floor blows on tea sips tea watches the TV screen opens chocolate eats chocolate sips tea puts chocolate wrapper on floor		The tea has crinkled that piece of paper so I leave the back of it blank and start a new sheet. I sitting down on the floor of the lounge facing the TV. I’ve blown the top of my tea in circular movements and now I’m blowing it in a criss-cross pattern, like a grid. Eventually I take a sip but it’s still too hot. I notice that the taste of tea never quite lives up to the feel of the warm mug in your hand and the action of blowing the top. There is some bizarre TV program on - B has the remote control and is sitting on a chair eating his spud. I know that I am not going to watch this program for very long.

15:28
picks up chocolate wrapper crawls to bin puts chocolate wrapper in bin crawls back rolls over onto back		Finish my tea and I’m getting bored and tired. I am not sure that I have the energy to to any work. I crawl over the lounge carpet to the bin to throw my chocolate wrapper away. I’m suddenly very tired and roll over onto my back & close my eyes for a couple of minutes. I blame my drowsiness on the pint. B leaves the room and makes noises in the kitchen. I stare at the underside of the ironing board thinking almost nothing at all.

13:38
stands up walks upstairs stops halfway up turns around		B comes back in & starts to follow me upstairs. I’m complaining to him that I am tired. He suggests going to sleep. I hate sleeping in the day so I tell him I don’t want to. He then suggests going to a DIY store to get wood for the cupboard we are building and mauls me about a bit trying to wake me up and instill some enthusiasm. I haven’t got the energy for this.

pushes B repeats		He’s standing two steps below me still. We push each other around a bit on the stairs half-heartedly bullying each other till eventually B gets bored of it and tells me he’s going to bed. I hate it when he does this.

walks to spare room		I’m looking at the PC, not particularly tempted by it and annoyed that B’s gone to bed.

walks into bedroom sits on the bed sits on B walks into spare room		I’m going into the bedroom to pester B to see if I can get him to get up again and amuse me. He’s vaguely responsive to start with but won’t get out of bed so I give up and return to the PC even more bored and irritated.

16:05
		I stop the game that I left playing and press play on the CD remote control. I start messing around with a drawing package not really sure what I am aiming to do.

17:00
		I am creating a couple of banners to advertise my web site, one of which is animated, hoping that they will attract a better click through rate than my previous one. I mail a friend to tell him that I have created them and ask if he will replace the old banner with whichever of these he thinks will work the best.

17:02
		I search the web for examples of "passive tense" used in scientific papers documenting experiments. Now I’ve somehow ended up looking at web pages about NMR Spectroscopy. I wonder if B would be interested in some of these organic chemistry sites. I’m going to copy some of these interesting diagrams and graphs, hoping that they will inspire some drawings at some point.

17:40
		I can hear B in the bathroom. Now I can hear water running. I’ve just got to a web page that allows you to run an analysis on a remote NMR machine. I don’t really understand how this could work so I call B. He is standing behind me and tells me which of each of the options to choose. I’m clicking on the button to run the experiment and we wait for the screen to download. The site returns a message saying that the machine is not currently available for running new experiments and only the results of the last experiment can be displayed. I’ve already seen those, they’re boring.B’s turns round and is leaving the room.I’m hanging up the modem now.

walks to the bathroom pushes door to sits down on toilet urinates takes toilet paper wipes stands up flushes

turns round		I stare at myself in the mirror, pick a couple of spots, pull a few hairs out with tweezers, then decide to go and find B.

walks into spare room picks up glass walks to kitchen puts glass down walks to lounge stand behind B sitting in chair talks to B		He’s in the lounge. He is sitting in a "directors" chair in front of the TV. I’m massaging his shoulders gently as I notice that he is folding clean clothes from the washing basket.

sits down on floor		He’s finished the larger clothes now and is left with the socks, which he starts to pair up. I sit down on the floor to help him.

talks to B		We discuss what to have for supper. I am peckish but B is not hungry so I decide to have a bowl of cereal.

walks to kitchen opens cupboard picks up bowl closes cupboard takes cereal packet from shelf opens cereal packet pours cereal into bowl closes packet replaces packet on shelf puts some cereal into mouth
opens fridge takes bottle of milk closes fridge takes lid off bottle empties milk into bowl puts bottle next to sink puts lid in bin opens fridge takes bottle of milk opens bottle pours some milk into bowl replaces lid opens fridge puts bottle in fridge closes fridge opens drawer picks up spoon puts spoon into bowl picks up bowl

walks into lounge sits on floor puts bowl on floor		I want to watch this film but I can’t really hear the dialogue. I’ll go and get my hearing-aid, where will it be? Um . . in the bedroom I think.

stands up walks upstairs to bedroom picks up hearing-aid walks downstairs to lounge sits down on cushion puts hearing-aid in picks up bowl eats cereal

18:20
stands up picks up bowl walks to kitchen puts bowl down on kitchen surface		I can see B ironing out of the corner of my eye as I watch the TV and eat my cereal. I’m going to make a cup of tea in a minute so I ask him if he would like one and he says yes.

18:30
switches kettle on opens cupboard picks up two mugs puts mugs on kitchen surface opens cupboard picks up tin opens tin

puts teabag in one mug puts another teabag in the other mug closes tin replaces tin closes cupboard opens drawer takes teaspoon closes drawer pours water into both mugs opens fridge takes milk bottle closes fridge puts bottle down on kitchen surface stirs both teabags with teaspoon removes teabags and drops into bin pours milk into each mug takes milk bottle opens fridge puts bottle in fridge closes fridge		There’s a small cut just below my little finger, on the palm side of my left hand. I’ve only just noticed it.
picks up both mugs walks into lounge puts one mug on table picks up floor cushion walks to other corner puts cushion down sits down on cushion crosses legs

18:45
sits watching TV stands up walks into hall picks up leaflet picks up pen walks into lounge		Getting bored of the TV, I have started twirling my hair with my right hand and am holding my mug of tea against my left cheek. I remember that I have a form to fill in for an ISA and fetch it from the hall notice-board.

19:15
writes on form talks with B		The form is completed. I have had various discussions with B about the information I am filling in and the options I have to choose from. He asks what the investment limit is and is concerned that the form I have is for a mini ISA and perhaps is the wrong choice of savings scheme. I decide to discuss it at the information desk at the bank the following day. I wonder if I can do this online.

19:20
picks up container speaks to hamster		Notice that the hamster is chewing on the wooden core of a finished nut stick.

removes alfa-alfa stick puts container down removes stopper from side of cage puts alfa-alfa stick in replaces stopper		I watch the daft animal trying to get the alfa-alfa stick up the tube to the next room. She spends a good few minutes working at this.

19:25
walks upstairs sits down at PC shouts to B downstairs		Decide to check out the ISA options online C is going to come upstairs and discuss them with me. B shouts up that he’s just found a program he wants to watch so he’ll come up when it finishes. Go to the online banking page and try to log in. Realise that I don’t remember what password I have used. B comes up the program was already near the end. Eventually I lock the account out on the third attempt.

picks telephone up dials speaks to receiver hangs up talks with B		I’m going to phone the bank to get a new PIN. They agree to send one in the post but it takes 4/5 working days. We then go to the normal banking page and I realise that I didn’t need to log into the online banking area to get this information anyway.

20:00
		Fed up of logging this stuff. Not going to do any more. That’s it.